xxelainaxx (xxelainaxx) wrote,

Why do I always do this to myself?
I get attatched to people so easily.
I need to stop.
I can't take it! I know I brought it all on myself.
Its my fucking fault for letting myself get so attatched.
I can't let myself do this anymore.
I have to distance myself. From everyone.
It never fails...Ever. Every single time I get close to someone..
I'm just huurting myself.
This is so pointless.
My stupidity. It hurts me in so many ways.
I love him, and I just want to help him. Know whats bothering him..
Thats all. And he won't say.
I have never even met this guy, but I do love him, hes such a great friend. I know I shouldn't let myself do this..I know.
I can't help it.
But now theres somthign wrong and he won't tell me.
And it's killing me.
I swear it. My friends will be the death of me.
I can't let myself get close to him anymore.
He's honestly killing me. I can't take this.
I don't know what the hell is wrong with me..I just know I can't do this to myself anymore.
Its too much of a bother.
I need to just let go...
Let go of all my friends...
The more attatched I get to them, the more it pains me when shit like this happens. And most emotionally stable people can handle it.
But I fucking can't.
I swear to god, if I keep getting closer to them...It will be the death of me.
I want to be his friend though.
It hurts so bad for me to know that there is ibviously something wrong with him, and he won't tell me..
I worry that he just doesn't want to be my friend anymore..
But if thats the case, then I'd rather that be his problem than have something worse be wrong...I'd rather him be happy.
And if not being his friend maked him happy, I'll sacrifice my happiness for him.
This is killing me.
It truely is.
No more friends..No.
I can''t get attached to any more people.
Never ever again...

"Come on, come all, your just in time to witness my first breakdown.."

  • (no subject)

    I miss writing on here. *sigh* Go away journal stalkers!

  • (no subject)

    I truely hope you are happy now. That is all. Have a nice day, dear.

  • I'm done.

    I'm done. Leave me alone. I give up. You win.

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